the virgin suicides

diamond eyes of the girls from The Virgin Suicides are chasing me like far-away stars from pale empty sky. I have seen the film when I was at my grandmother's house on holidays and it really inspires me and change my life. The Virgin Suicides fill me with black emptiness and moony sleepy thoughts about the 70s and indifferent minds of people surrounding me.

Sophia Coppola is an artist, drawing the 70s and their atmosphere with tender pastel colors and chewing gum, not a director at all. she makes her films magic and airy-fairy, sometimes with sweet caramel melancholy and that's why my soul fell in love with her work.

when I watched The Virgin Suicides, something in me crushed. I feel noisy sound my heart breaking. it's like I return to a dreamland of Alice and little children. I am asleep and nothing can wake me up, my heart is full of peach-pink clouds and imaginable but empty music.

so who are they: who are the suicidal virgins?

I answer: me and you.

look at this girls. charming and joyful like sun. how could they do this mysterious and scary thing- suicide?

my virgin suicides look. *_*

I am dancing through sky with teen dreams in my mind .

musiiiiiiiic! or how it changes us

i have so many favorite singers and songwriters that i can't count them. i love all genres, i think. Indie-pop, grunge rock, rock-n-roll, electronic, country, hip hop, synth-pop... i am tired of listing all of them. music is my passion, my obsession, and my drug, and i can't live without melodies in my head and ears. music became flashes of colors, rains, sunshine, youth and teen ages and paint my life in magic glittering world of unicorns, fairies, Nicki Minaj and lipsticks. flowing down, it make me feel like i am in girl's daydreams...

music has extraordinary power to change mood and all life. can you imagine the world without any sound? silence kills our organisms, our bodies, our souls. i can be forgotten in times with Hole, Grimes, Lana del Rey, Bjork, Iggy Pop, Beyonce, Taylor Swift, Marina and the Diamonds and many-many-many bands and singers in my ears. Jane Lane from the serial Daria said once: ' If people suck me, i wear my headphones. ' love your mind, Jane! i use this :) if there was no music and blogspot (tumblr), i would suicide :D

and we also know that music explodes our lives. music in psychological meaning influences on our minds, completely changing position, mood, perceptions of the world, makes us feel better or worse, tired or active. have you ever thought of energy of sounds? i do. contrasting colors of human voice, keyboard, piano, violin, guitar, etc enters our brains and change the digital code that directs all our actions and our spiritual condition. well, music is unexplainably thing that manages us, and 'tell me what do you listen to and i would tell who are you'.

there is a tiny moodboard :)

unknown vintage photo

sunday moodboard. candy edition

we should thank candies for our excess weight :)) 

and Miss Worlds for our inferiority complex...

today was a cool sunny day and i feel myself airy-fairy and cheerful. i wanted to post something 70s sunny like the sky in my fantasies was, so i found delicious photos and pictures in the endless folders of pictures and photos :) this moodboard is made for inspiration that is fiven by blurry summertime. lana del rey's official music video Summertima Sadness is colorful palette of intimate thoughts, suicidal weather and calm blossom wind in hair.

feminine feminism

feminism is an interesting science how to be feminine. interesting thing: feminists are against the female as a sexual object for men, but are in favor of women sexuality on the opposite hand. feminism makes girls and women more confident and, stands up for liberty and fight with the infringements of women. some of girls in my school don't know what it means to be a feminist, they describe feminism as stupid unfeminine lifestyle with lots of strikes and bans on lipsticks, bras and evening dresses. if i wasn't interested in that and if Tavi Gevinson didn't explain feminist rules, i would think of it like my classmates, say 'pheeeeeeewwww!'. life without girl's stuff??????!!!

 i can't explain why i began being a feminist. i have read articles about feminists in historical journals and was interested in feminist's blogs, and this theme was good to think of life sense. i was very outraged that a woman should be 'a slave' for man and that female gender is found 'weak'. this stereotypes was invented by men who wanted women to be subordinated. but didn't they think that some of girls couldn't reconcile? these girls are feminists. 

the most popular question asked me is how do people in school relate to my opinions about feminism, so i think i shouldn't write a large answer: this picture shows it.

teen queens

hi. this post will be about teenage queens and popular idols, and about status (or diagnosis?) miss world in our school. i realized that this theme is one of the most interesting for me: why is someone popular in the society and someone not?

i have no power on my classmates, i am NOT popular, and some time ago my position was that i am a worthless and ugly girl, but than i thought: why is good to be a queen of a little country called high school? i was thinking of these and suddenly i decided how awful is the policy of the complicated business 'to be miss world'. you should have a 'hot' body and sexy boobs, wear glamorous fashionable clothes that open all the secret 'places' of your body and be the highest standard, be a girl who are followed in style and who's opinion considers by almost all of people. i didn't want to be an ordinary queen who's life is like other queens' lives, so i broke all the stereotypes that were in my head before and started to implement my plans 'how to be special'.

changing my opinion about popularity in schools, i became more confident and unselfconscious and wanted my friend to stop believe stupid beauty norms. that was the time when i first was sure that i am a feminist and female rights were very important for me. i said my friend: 'why are they popular?- pointed on blonde model girl.- they have no smart ideas in their minds, and the only things they think about are cosmetics, fashionable brend dresses and kisses and sex with boys. i can't stand and understand this fashion.' she agreed with me, but said: 'they are popular, and we are not. so this means that we are loosers and our opinions are stupid. we can run away from our deep thoughts of envy, but we should recognize: if the society, if the most of people decide how to be ideal and choose 'miss worlds' by themselves, they are right. Unluckily, we are minority, so we should keep our position in secret. or we will be absolutely derelicts. do you want to be a derilict? i don't.'

i thought of her worlds, and suddenly said: 'this is stupid to be derelicts, but more stupid is to keep our opinions in secret.'

i wanted no stereotypes. and i broke them. i want to change all of teenagers, not only me.

fall in love with MK fall 2013 collection and moodboard

i was all in crazy stuff called SCHOOL. awful word, isn't it?

so it's right time to write here, where was no posts since 14 of February.  i have recognized that an organized life is better than my own. but what am i saying? i will be always disorganized teenage girl and no my thoughts about starting new life are useless and only take away my time.

you know that the PFW was started very long time ago (two months) :) and i don't want any talks about it. you, i think, are sitting on style.com like a maniacal person and read, read, read, read stuff like reports and characteristics of fashion gorgeous ( or not? read about Balenciaga show ) shows with lots of gorgeous fashion monsters and photographers, journalists and bloggers. i am sure you write about your favourite ones in your blogs, but i won't do it, because i don't think you don't know something. i will write only about Meadham Kirchhof, but not too much. 

well, i know that Rookiemag feminist girls are in big love with too young designers, who's dresses and shoes are like caramel cloudy cakes in romantic laces and bows and are inspired by Maria Antoinette's time style. and so do i. ^_^ pastel colors of delicious candies and unusual girlish cut and sunny motives, red lipstick and purple hair like from the most brave teen daydreams - so attractive for us, girls, yes? 

but this collection is not like others. it has suicide black meaning. crowns with heart pattern ( girl's accessories ), black-and-white latex and laces like from retro photos and long monastic dresses like from the Middle Ages. tragic melodies of clothes leaked from the photos. i am a bit amazed. like i turned in the Sophia Coppola film The Virgin Suicides. to end my opinion, i would say: MEADHAMKIRCHHOFFILOVEYOUUUUU!!!!